So in no particular order:

 

We all struggled through and continued to pay the price of banker failures

Government told examiners how to mark exam papers

Facebook went public and immediately lost millions for millions

The Queen was impressed by a hula hooping Grace Jones

Games makers all made us smile

Mitt Romney admitted to a little gay bashing in his younger days

The Suni and Shia continued their battles – same as it ever was

Syria planted landmines on its border…to stop its enemies getting out…

An English businessman was killed in mysterious circumstances in China

Julian Assange hid out in an embassy

There was talk of building pavements in the sky or ‘skyways’ for cyclists

Panorama falsely accused a politician of molesting children

MPs claimed expenses for second houses for their mistresses

Oracle said that the world is running out of space for all its data

England reduced the New Zealand rugby team to just another team

Iran talked about nuclear deterrents in order to go nuclear

Felix Baumgartner fell to earth very very fast

Ash trees were reduced to ashes

More soldiers died for nothing in Afghanistan

Peter Higgs discovered the future

Less people applied to university

Hillsborough victims got their justice, a bit of a shock for Boris Johnson…

A new governor was appointed to the Bank of England from Canada… and Goldman Sachs

Ex Goldman Sachs technocrats ran European economies… for the benefit of themselves… but mostly Goldman Sachs

Argentina seized back its oil resources, Ecuador seized back its national grid, Putin went after Russia’s oil

The paralympians inspired so that the disabled went from being seen as sub-human to superhuman

For a few weeks the UK became a different country called Olympia where we all talked to each other for a while

The Olympians were heroes, heroes to the last

The son of India’s President called anti-rape protesters “dented and painted”

We missed the inflation target as if it ever was one

Boris Johnson invited over more bankers from France because we need more of them obviously

George Osborne made things worse as he always has and extended the recession

Bosses mumbled about values at Davos and then went back to the day job

The right wing press continued their sycophantic support of the right wing

The right wing continued their sycophantic support of the right wing press

Cameron abandoned a few ministers and policies as usual

Hockney had a successful run at the Royal Academy with his tablet paintings

The banks and lobbyists continued to revise history to say it was all our fault and exonerate themselves of any blame… or involvement…they weren’t there in fact

Danny Alexander was a worry…is a worry

Fuel edged up towards £1.50 a litre and society became a little less mobile

The church remained in the dark ages and shunned women for another 3 years

Osborne nicked the Royal Mail pension fund for £35bn

Cameron kept on rambling on about dementia…

Andy Murray lost and cried at Wimbledon, so cometh the man

England attempted to play football at the Euros

Spain played football at the Euros

The suicide rate in Greece rocketed

Banks got away with murder for another year

The financial markets continued to prey on nations in financial difficulties

Pay day loans companies thrived like vultures over a wildebeest massacre

Rupert Murdoch was the acid in the blood as usual

Rebecca Brooks was unrepentant like the cold-hearted bitch that she is

Charlie Brooks fired a warning shot at the PM about tennis shots with the PM

A former TV presenter who used to fulfill children’s dreams turned out to have fulfilled children’s nightmares

Osborne called green campaigners the environmental Taliban

Scientists estimated that Antarctica is warming twice as fast as expected

The world population was 7.06 billion

We all learned a bit more about something called “Libor”

Hollande arrived in France

Nick Clegg said sorry

There was a lot of hot air over wind farms

Hurricane Sandy blew away hurricane Romney

Kids were blown away like a hurricane in Sandy Hook

News International was found to have had a blackmail team to ‘out’ politicians

Bob Diamond paid the price of illegally fixing the price in spite of calling everyone by their first name and declaring his love for Queen and company…

The Prudential threatened to leave the UK because of new rules they don’t like

Banks and insurance companies quietly bought water companies

Wheat and commodities traders (bankers) quietly bought wheat and commodities companies to control the food supply and own Africa and the world

Tony Blair brokered a merger between two major commodities traders so they can have even more control of the food supply and own Africa and the world

Tony Blair made a lot of money and went on about his philanthropy in Africa whilst at the same time aiding Africa’s downfall

China and Japan disputed some islands

George Entwistle was new DG of the BBC for about 3 months

Head of BP Bob Dudley, said casually that the world has enough oil reserves for the next 54 years…then what…

14 protected and endangered one-horned rhinos died in floods in India

Sir John Gurdon turned all cells into stem cells and was duly awarded a Nobel

The Nobel Peace prize went to the European Union…

Christies had a bumper year

Most people got poorer

Government said it can cut £4bn by cutting disability allowances

Government bank bailouts recently estimated at £700bn, half national debt

Interest on national debt approximately £50bn

George Osborne made things worse as ever

5000 tigers were estimated to exist in the wild

Mr. MacAfee went on the run

Sainsbury’s said that carrots on the shelves will be ‘uglier’ than normal

A women died of hunger in Uganda

Chavez remained in power

Many in the UK slid silently into fuel poverty

Many in the UK slid silently into poverty

Alcohol related offenders were told they would wear bracelets to monitor alcohol levels, the first personal black box, next will be an implant

The Olympics were awesome

Sideburns made a comeback

Arise Sir Bradley

People made heart shapes with their fingers and thumbs

Seb Coe brought home the gold…again

The Olympics was lit up by a Bolt not from the blue

A man called Mo lifted his arms and lifted the nation

A sailor got angry, people howled at the Weirwolf, rowers wept and Jessica smiled and cried and smiled

Andy Murray won at last

Swedish House Mafia broke up, the Stones kept on going

Some European golfers made an impossible comeback

Starbucks were busted, as was Google and Amazon and Facebook…

The Standard blamed the last government

The Standard blamed the eurocrisis on protesters and strikers

The Standard won Boris Johnson the mayoral election

Boris Johnson thanked the Standard for its ‘sterling work’

Rail fares went up, gas bills went up, electricity bills went up, council tax went up, food went up, water bills went up, airfare tax went up, car insurance went up

Most things…went up… incomes went down – something’s wrong there

High street shops closed down

It was almost £100 to fill an average car

Andy Murray won at last in America!

James Mini Murdoch quietly went back onto the board at BSkyB

Admiralty Arch went up for sale along with other bits of Britain, like rivers

HSBC was done for money laundering

Andy Haldane of the Bank of England said that Occupy had a point…

A US republican congressman stated categorically the world is 9000 years old

Arts were removed from the national curriculum

Students sold their faces for advertising

Apprenticeships programmed launch to make more lawyers and accountants

Tory funder and tax exile $Lord$ Ashcroft said we should stop giving to the third world

Barak Obama remained in power

Rihanna sang with David Guetta, Adele sang with passion and pain, Ravi stopped playing and the Stones played on

Bond was back

The last shuttle was towed through LA streets

Lance Armstrong, if things seem too good to be true….

Blood proved thicker than water, gold proved thicker than blood, but love proved thicker than gold

What a year…

 

Here’s wishing you a great 2013.   Peace and joy to all.